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Ten-Minute Writing - March 25, 2019

3/25/2019

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​I've given a lot of thought lately to dog owners' relationships with their dogs, or obviously more specifically, my relationship to my first dogs, Daisy & Sara, and now, to my two-year-old German Shepherd mix, Gracie. People in the dog world typically say that their dog is a member of the family, which is certainly true, since in a very real way my Gracie has access to my life, my home, my car and my workspace that a family member would have. And I certainly value Gracie's life and well-being more than I value my home, car, workspace, etc. (even though I 'love' all of them quite a bit). But the rleationship with a dog goes much deeper and is in many ways more profound. I had Daisy from when I adopted her as a three-month-old pup to the end of her life--which I witnessed intimately--and through those fifteen years her personality obviously changed from puppyhood to adolescent dog, eventually to elder dog, yet her desire to be around me, or next to me never changed. For Sara, who I adopted at age one, and whom I had until she passed rather suddenly at age 13.5--also which I witnessed intimately--she, too, mantained the same personality, and desire to be around and with me (though she was far more aloof than Daisy). Gracie, it is obvious already, wants or needs to be around me even more than my first two. That may be a matter of she has no other canine companion, as Daisy and Sara did for 12.5 years, but I think it is simply more a matter of her personality. And because of this, in a sense, Gracie is more a part of "me" than simply a family member. I mean that, in this way: I must obviously tend to all of her bodily functions, by taking her for walks, her health needs, by taking her to the vet, her nutrition needs, by feeding her and giving her water, and, of course, her social development needs, by bringing her to the park to play or meet other dogs. Her needs are an integral part of my daily calendar, so in a strange way, they are a part of "my" needs. I can not ignore or abandon those needs. Ever. I can have a stand-in, as I sometimes do, with a dogwalker. But Gracie (as was the case with Daisy and Sara) must be taken care of. Now, I don't intend in any way to say that having a dog is as hard or as much work or comparable to having a child--though I don't have children, I know this is not true. However, at many stages in the life of a child, adolescent, and teenager, he or she can take care of their own basic needs, and often have their own interests or desires, whereby the parent is not their sole focus. For most parents it's bittersweet that their child is evolving and getting older, but also that they are "breaking away." I haven't seen that with dogs, in general, and with my dogs, in particular. In the case of Gracie, of course, she loves palying with other dogs and can be fixated on a squirrel or some other animal she sees, but when we are at work or at home, she likes nothing better than to be next to me.

​[To be continued.]
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